Today's fatwa update: Saudi "death to cable" cleric: Just Kidding!

No seriously, you guys took me out of context and misinterpreted me and stuff.

"What I said about the killing of the owners of these channels is that it is permissible for the authorities to kill them in accordance with a judicial ruling if they do not stop such evil transmissions," he said.

Thanks for clearing that up, Shaikh. Good to see that free speech is alive and well in the kingdom. In today's other Saudi fatwa news. Don't be counting on that old pick up line, "what's your sign" when cruising the all-male Saudi juice bars!:

Meanwhile, another senior Saudi cleric has come out with controversial statements. Shaikh Saleh Al Fozan told Al Madina daily on Sunday that astrologers on Arab television should face the death penalty.

"Sorcerers who appear on satellite channels have committed a great crime ... and the Muslim consensus is that the apostate's punishment is death by the sword," he said.

Hold on, folks. This fatwa just in.

From Morocco: Go ahead and marry that nine year old, you horny old goat.

A Moroccan Islamic theologian, Mohamed Ben Sheikh Abderrahman Al Maghraoui, has caused a great stir by stating "A nine-year-old girl has the same sexual capacities as a woman of 20 and over". He issued a fatwa (Islamic edict) where he "legalizes" the union between a child and an adult male. "We found that girls of that age give better benefits than adult women," he says.